It’s worth reminding ourselves that all reviews, particularly music reviews are inherently subjective - a moot point you would think. Asking Joe ‘Slayer forever scrawled in my own blood at Donnington’ Blog to review the latest Norah Jones album while ostensibly fine (even progressive) will most likely be met with Joe needing stitches as he removed the Vinyl needle from his ears: The scales are slightly tipped that it will be met with contempt:. It’s not to say it’s necessarily a foregone conclusion. Preference 1 Norah 0 you might say, unless perhaps Joe takes one look at the album sleeve and decides regardless that he is going to hate this. A lot. And before you can say listen without prejudice, Joe proceeds to vent his musical spleen on a widely influential music website crying ‘Crucify her Crucify her !’
An opinion is one thing, a responsible opinion is a different animal altogether, and is a prerequisite not a luxury when entering the murky waters of music reviews. Every Spidey fan knows great power brings responsibility: having the ears and eyes of thousands of eager musos brings with it a high level of expectation and even higher level of responsibility. If there is a better online music website than Pitchfork than I don’t know it. It’s insight, coverage, reviews, and sheer scope really is inspiring. Typically the reviews are well written (enviably so), to the point where I invariably might not agree with an expressed opinion, but am prepared to understand and accept it. More often than not however I find myself silently nodding in agreement or worse still grinning wildly at some bon mot. Less of a testiment to me and more to the standard of writing on offer. They know their music and even more delightful, they know how to write about it. Pitchfork are the cool kid in school whose approval you so desperately seek. Is the new R.E.M album any good ? – What do Pitchfork say about it ? Xiu Xiu and Elf power are both playing in Portland tonight, Grr ! Help Pitchfork, who do I see ? Kelly Clarkson was bestowed the accolade of single of the year for ‘Since U been Gone’, and it’s not unusual to see Pop chattle mingling with the most obscure in its news section. It’s all about the music you see, no N.M.E posturing and mythologizing here. It’s all about the choons man.
Pitchfork don’t like Bell X1 (and specifically the Stateside release of ‘Flock’) like The White Stripes don’t like bass players: Both are seen as unnecessary, out of place even , but with the distinct difference that you don’t hear Jack White sneering bout the latter: he’s too busy recording the sixth version of ‘White Blood Cells’ to pontificate why six strings are better than four. Similarly after reading Ian Cohen’s piece I can’t help wishing Pitchfork would stick to what they do best. Apparently Bell X1’s brand of ‘Coldplay/Verve’ inspired music merits a 2.2 on the only scale of worthiness that matters, which is approximately two more than he originally want to give I’d guess.This isn’t about condemning opinions and reviews that run contrary to your own - this certainly isn’t the rant of a disgruntled Bell X1 fan: If anything it’s a disgruntled Pitchfork reader. The point is not that Pitchfork don’t like Bell X1, nor is it that they gave them a bad review. It is the justification and disproportionate level of ire levelled at them. It’s a bad album ? Fine, it is not however a 2.2 bad. That is a special handicap reserved for the uber woeful, the figurehead on the totem pole of disgrace. The I-just-cannot-believe-they-got-funding-for-that level of awfulness (The lazy thing to do here would be to volunteer my own nominations for a 2.2 rating (fine I’m lazy, try Cascada, Westlife, limp bizkit, all you musical masochists)). This level of dirge is for the most insipid, musically incompetent souls out there. I’m listening to Flock as I write this and there is nothing 2.2 about it. Granted I don’t get particularly excited by Noonan and co, but I certainly don’t hate them (look no slayer tattoo !) – look on me as a musical Voltaire of sorts, ‘ I don’t agree with what you sing boys, but I’ll defend to the death your right to sing it without being subjected to the equivalent of motiveless band assassination’. Continue Reading »
